I had every intention of getting home from Watershed yesterday and doing all my laundry, unpacking and writing the best recap ever.
Instead I crawled into bed because I was still half drunk and laid there unmoving for about 67 hours.
The only time I could be disturbed was to sip water and there was that brief moment when I gathered
enough strength to roll into Taco Bell still in my pajamas un-showered looking like hell on wheels.
I am so glad I did that.
The best 10 dollars I have ever spent at Taco Bell.
Anyway what you should know is it took me all day yesterday to recover.
I felt like my life was in shambles once I returned.
I literally came flying in the door and when my dad asked me how it was this is exactly what I said
“DAD LOOK AT ME I AM IN FREAKIN SUN DRESS WITH YOGA PANTS ON! MY FEET ARE BLACK AS NIGHT! I NEED TO BE PUT TO BED ASAP!”
So that is exactly what I did.
I went straight to bed and I vaguely remember him poking his head in the room at one point to find me sprawled across my bed two puppies cuddled up next to me and he may or may not have said something like this
“ My poor child is passed out, she looks like a wreck.”
Thanks Papa Chuck.
I love you too.
Although in his defense I honestly did look like a wreck.
As does my room…but onto more important things.
Lets first discuss all the things I lost this weekend shall we?
First of all and the most heartbreaking of them all is my beloved Kate Spade sunnies.
I knew I should have removed those from my face halfway through the car ride and left them tucked away and sported my walmart specials but by the time we headed to the concert Friday night I was too drunk to even realize what I was wearing. AKA my swim suit a white tank top and plaid shorts. I looked like something else.
The next thing I lost was my dignity and I say this because it is true.
While I barely have much of it left to begin with the rest of it is now laying somewhere between the ampitheatre and the campground.
I was scattering it all about for the whole world to see in my drunkness.
From my sweet dance moves to the “trueblood fairy” that my Trashley insisted I spend the evening with (at the concert not in his tent mind you) to the river, to my one leg sticking straight out of the tent while I slept.
My dignity was out and about being sprinkled around like a flower girl at a wedding.
Oh don’t let me forget about that moment when I literally went swimming after a dog so I could pet him and as I was following behind him scratching his back I was yelling:
“COMMIN IN HOT OUTTA THE WAY”.
My white skin was the next thing to go out the window.
And although this sounds amazing it isn't because in its place is a red hot lobster.
I used sunscreen and I still managed to get the most epic sunburn ever.
Not only do I have a sunburn but it’s a fat red strip right down my legs.
That double tube sounded like such a good idea in looking back getting my ass out of it and switching positions from time to time may have been a good idea.
I also lost my voice shockingly enough because I am probably one of the
quietest people I know… riiight.
I think that may sum up what I lost.
On that note let me just intrigue and entertain you with a few photos from my epic adventure I warn you in advance that once a drop or two of booze gets into Trashley and I’s systems all good photo taking goes out the window to be replaced with our “pretty faces”.
|Nap time, pretty faces and a lobster.|
|The beautiful view, my drunk ass and me and my Trash|
|So excited yet unaware of what was in store for me.|
|A little rode soda on the way to quench my thirst...|